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She curled her body into a ball and was not moving. She was still and silent. She only moved when his leg kicked hard into her back. His strong kick pushed Abby slowly around the closet.
    I had tried fighting the boy before, and he was too strong. I tried fighting him enough times to know that it would be worse to try. The only thing to do was to lie down, hold Abby’s back against my belly, and wrap my legs around her to block his kicks.
    He kicked my back for a long time. It felt like a very long time. And then he left. My back hurt for many days. Abby took a long time to stand up straight again.
    He was a Mean Boy. The meanest. I hate him and I will always hate him.
    61
    Dear Penny,
    I went to the lake today. It was so hot that I had to go in the water or I would die. I promise that I kept my eyes on you the whole time I was in the water. I didn’t put my head under. Not even once. I stood in the water and watched you. The water is blue and clear and cool.
    It is still hot and I am tired.
    62
    Dear Penny,
    I stole things from the nannies. I stole things that they didn’t need. The nannies had an office in the orphanage. They kept their things in the office. There were desks and chairs, but I never saw them sitting in them.
    Actually, the nannies never really used the office. There were too many other things to do. I was not allowed in there, but I went in anyway. I needed to be careful because if I was caught in the office, then I would be in big trouble. I never got caught. I knew when to go in and I was patient.
    I stole candy. There were little yellow hard candies that were wrapped in red. I loved those candies. I wanted to hold them in my mouth forever. I couldn’t do that because the nannies would see me. I needed to bite down and crunch and chew as fast as possible.
    For some reason American families who adopted children in the orphanage would give the nannies perfume and lotion. The nannies had many desk drawers filled with different smelling bottles. One time I found a perfume that I needed to keep smelling. I took it. It smelled like cookies. It made me smile when I smelled it.
    I put the perfume in my pocket and quickly carried it to the baby room. In the baby room there was a wall of closets. There were many doors and many shelves. Inside the closets was everything that a baby needs. There were blankets and bottles and medicines. I knew the closets that were never opened. I put the perfume in the back of a closet that was never used.
    I couldn’t put the perfume on me, or somebody would notice. But I smelled the bottle every day. Sometimes I would smell the bottle many times in one day.
    I miss the smell.
    The perfume was one of many little things that I tucked inside the baby room closets. I wonder if they will ever be found.
    63
    Dear Penny,
    My birthday is coming soon. It is a pretend birthday. I don’t know how old I am, and I don’t have a birthday. Wanna told me that when we were found in the box, we were taken to the orphanage. A doctor in the orphanage guessed my age and my birthday. He guessed. He didn’t know for sure. The doctor looked at me and decided how old I was.
    I don’t have a real birthday. My birthday is a guess day.
    Wanna asked me what I wanted to do on my birthday, and I told her nothing. I don’t want to do anything. I never did anything in China for my birthday. Why should I start now?
    64
    Dear Penny,
    The nannies called Abby the ghost baby. They whispered it, but I still heard them. When Abby arrived in the orphanage, they were afraid of her. They were scared of her grey eyes and white hair, and they thought that she was bad luck. I think that is why they put me in charge of taking care of her. The Chinese are always talking about luck, good luck and bad luck. They definitely thought that Abby was bad luck. So they gave her to me. Did someone else take care of her after I left, or was she all alone?
    65
    Dear Penny,
    It is not much fun to steal from Ellie. She doesn’t care.