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just the study,” I said. “They’re placing it all around the house. Charlie has gone to investigate. We sent Charlie because he’s the only ghosty who can pass through. Good old Charlie Vapor!”
    â€œI wish I had a skill,” said Wither.
    â€œYou can write abysmal poems,” said Humphrey Bump.
    â€œOh, how mean!”
    â€œI think your poems are delightful,” I said, though honestly, I thought they were drivel.
    â€œI don’t want to write poems,” said Wither. “Who reads poems these days? I want to float through walls like Charlie, or blow leaves across the lawn like dear Agatha.”
    â€œYou can blub,” said Humphrey.
    â€œOh!” cried Wither, and he floated off for a blub.
    â€œThis is no time for blubbing,” I said. “Here’s Charlie.”
    â€œThat house wafts to high heaven. They’ve nailed garlic cloves to every door in the house.”
    â€œPerhaps they’re expecting vampires,” Wither said, floating back. “Garlic wards off evil forces.”
    â€œThe leggy spider didn’t seem to mind garlic,” said Pamela.
    â€œSpiders don’t have noses,” said Humphrey.
    â€œOh yes?” said Wither. “Then how do they smell?”
    Humphrey laughed. “Terrible.”
    Wither shook his head.
    â€œDon’t make jokes about spiders,” said Pamela. “I’m a nervous wreck as it is, and now the house is riddled with garlic.”
    â€œI could tidy it away,” offered Gertrude.
    â€œTabitha, you could float it out of the window,” said Charlie, adjusting his cuff links.
    â€œThey’ve nailed it to the doors. I’m a poltergeist, not a carpenter. Have they opened any more windows?”
    â€œOnly the study window and the lounge,” Charlie said.
    â€œHow can the still-alives stand the waft?”
    â€œThey’ve put clothespins on their noses, Tabitha. If only we could do that.”
    â€œWe can,” said Gertrude. “I use ghostly clothespins to hang out the ghostly garters. And the spooky bloomers. Oh, and Wither’s long johns.”
    â€œWither’s long johns waft almost as much as the garlic,” said Humphrey Bump.
    â€œDon’t be mean to my long johns. If I don’t wear long johns, my knees knock.”
    We floated about by the garden fence for a bit, feeling the breeze blow through our transparent bits. Then Charlie had an idea.
    â€œOur attempt at befriending the still-alives has failed. We need to get them out of the house. The only way to do that is to scare them out.”
    â€œWe can’t scare the still-alives,” I told him. “We’re too friendly.”
    Charlie adjusted his hat. “Then there is only one thing for it. We call in a professional.”

15
    The Ghoul
    The following afternoon, Wither and I were floating about in the lounge when we heard a ghostly tap at the window.
    â€œWho could that be?” I asked, looking at Wither. My voice sounded odd because of the clothespin.
    â€œIt could be the Ghoul,” said Wither. “We hired one, remember?”
    I peered out through the lace curtains. “I forgot we’d hired the Ghoul. This must be him. He’s ugly enough.”
    â€œOh, don’t be mean. Open the window, before he gets cross.”
    â€œI’m not sure I have the skills.”
    â€œTry,” said Wither. “Lift the latch.”
    â€œNot with you watching.”
    Wither covered his eyes with his haunted hands, and I gave the latch a jaunty jiggle.
    â€œThere. That’s the best I can do.”
    â€œWait here, Tabitha. I’ll float off and fetch Humphrey. Perhaps he can bump it.”
    The moment Wither had gone, I flung the window wide open and invited the Ghoul inside.
    A minute later, Wither returned with Humphrey Bump, followed by Charlie Vapor, Pamela Fraidy, Gertrude Goo, and Agatha Draft, each with a clothespin on the nose.
    â€œWould