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see
the ugly red mark that had formed.
    Then I laughed derisively
- even if I’d broken down the door, there was no way I was getting through with
this bed attached to my wrist. That never would have worked. Closing my eyes
and hating myself for both my stupidity and helplessness, I leaned back against
the door and blinked against the tears prickling my eyes.
    There has to be some way,
there has to be…
    Of course, because you’re
better than a killer that’s probably done this dozens of times? Because
somehow, out of all the kidnap victims in the world, you’re smarter, stronger,
braver? Fuck you, Alessa.
    I let the fear and
self-pity wash over me, sinking down to a crouch against the door and burying
my head in the crook of my elbow. These were the things I never let anyone else
see. As the eldest daughter of an Italian mafia boss, I was expected to be an
example - I had been, ever since my mother had died and I’d helped raise my two
younger sisters. And examples didn’t give in to fear, or wallow in
self-pity at their already over-privileged lives.
    I was a happy, polite,
obedient girl. Bright and smiling and dutiful. A source of pride to my family.
    It was just that all the
fear and uncertainty that I pushed aside around other people always came back
to haunt me. It put a lie to all those things and reminded me that I was human.
Average. Fragile. I’d get over it, and I sure as hell wouldn’t let anyone else
see it. But it didn’t change that it was there - and true.
    Whatever I wanted to
believe about myself, at the end of the day…there was nothing special there.
    And that sarcastic,
snarky voice in the back of my mind wasn’t going to let me forget that I was
just the daughter of a powerful family. Someone by association
only - certainly not by anything I’d ever done.
    I breathed deeply as I
let the hateful thoughts subside, shuddering with the crippling despair for a
few small moments until I managed to get it under control. As I focused on my
breathing, my eyes glanced back to the mess I’d made of the room, the bedframe
stood awkwardly on its side behind me.
    Hey, at least you got
this far, right?
    After forcing a couple
more positive thoughts, I managed to stand up again, shaking my head slowly.
Maybe I wasn’t the sort of person who could get herself out of crazed
situations like this, but I could keep trying.
    Giving the bed a wry
glance, I let my mouth tuck up in a smile.
    It’s not like you’re
getting any sleep, hmm?
    “You’re going crazy,
Alessa.” I muttered to myself as I moved over to the desk again.
    Apparently waiting alone
and helpless after witnessing a murder and being kidnapped wasn’t good for my
mental health - if the way voices kept snarking in my mind and I was starting
to talk to myself was any indication. I resisted the manic laugh that welled up
in me at the thought and sat down on the chair - pulling the bed behind me with
a wince at my wrist. If I wasn’t careful, that was going to start bleeding
soon.
    I took in a deep breath
and assessed my options again. I couldn’t get out of here without the key to
the handcuffs - and there was only one person who might have that. Which meant
confronting my kidnapper, at the very least.
    So…what did I know about
him.
    He was a highly skilled
assassin-slash-kidnapper with the body of a Greek god… focus!… an
intimidating stare, rough voice and he had no hesitation in pulling out a gun
and threatening a woman. He’d had no qualms about killing, and had been calm
and controlled throughout the whole dangerous situation, with enough cunning
and instinct to adapt to whatever had happened. He’d also seemed able to read
me like an open book, from the muttered reminders he’d given me every time I
was just about to try something.
    Great. And what did I
have against all that…?
    I glanced around the room
again. Maybe the element of surprise. Maybe.
    It was all I could think
of, and I couldn’t see it measuring up particularly