Read Just Fall for Free Online

in mutual, silent agreement, hungry for the other’s body as they had often been, but today there was a new intensity.
    Clothes dropped and peeled, shoes were kicked off, breath quickened, buttons popped. Ellie felt slick and liquid. Rob was urgent, rigid. He laid her back on the bed. Climbed atop her with delicious deliberateness and mounted her slowly. Teasing and tormenting. She pulled her legs up high. He held her face still between his hands. He looked directly into her eyes. It was almost too much for her. When her eyes closed, he brushed them open with the pads of his thumbs.
    The rhythm of their bodies, now that they were more familiar with each other, the way he cradled her head like it was a priceless objet d’art, the intensity of the silent communication of staring into each other’s eyes. The intimacy of it was like nothing she had ever known.
    When she came with a heaving cry, his grip on her face tightened almost painfully. He kissed her deeply, then finally loosed his hands and closed his eyes as he too was swept into orgasm, his body shuddering on top of hers. He burrowed his head into the soft curve of her neck. I’ve never been so happy, she thought. Then she said it out loud.

Ellie lifts Harry’s arm, which is draped over her midsection, and gets out of the bed they share. They are in a sweet little beach bungalow, nicely furnished: carved wood furniture and batik cushions, sisal mats on the hardwood floor, a private little patio, a luxurious and well-appointed bathroom. Ellie peeks through the window. The hot noon sun bakes the soft sand. Seagulls circle and cry. She’s stayed as long as she can in the relative safety she’s wrangled. She hasn’t slept, really; every time her eyes drifted, she jolted awake, breathless, chest squeezing. She’s exhausted. Her brain feels fuzzy, her thinking blurred by the endless convoluted permutations of “what next” she’s been running all night.
    She turns and looks at Harry, his position an eerie mirror of the dead man she left in the hotel room twenty hours ago.
    Look closer. Is there a knife? Is there blood? Has Harry met the same fate?

    No. He groans heavily and rolls to his side, twisting himself up in sheets.
    Ellie moves swiftly and quietly, gathering her things. She steps into the bathroom and closes the door, locking it behind her. She takes a good long look at herself in the mirror. Not too bad, considering. Dark patches beneath her eyes, her skin is a little dry, but beyond that her face does not reveal the ordeal that has become her life.
    She checks that the door is locked and pulls out the box of hair dye. “They” are looking for a blonde, so she can be blond no more.
    She slips the plastic gloves from the dye kit over her hands. Mixes the dye with its activator and shakes the bottle. She takes one last look in the mirror. Contemplates her pale skin and shiny blond hair, the girl she has always been. A look of pure melancholy crosses her face. Her entire body slumps; she places her palms down on either side of the sink, stands there, curled over, staring at the drain. Can she do this? Who is she? Who is she becoming? Should she have walked away when she had the chance?
    She lifts her head and stares at herself in the mirror once again. Suddenly, her fingers are clawing through the beach bag, searching until she finds the gold wedding band that is twisted into a handkerchief inside. She stares at the ring Rob had slipped on her finger as he recited vows about loving and protecting her that now seem ludicrous. He is a complete mystery, snarled henceforth and forever with her utter debasement. She has committed grotesque and venal acts for this man. How much further will she degrade herself? His remembered assurances fade, empty echoing memories. She feels her anger flare. She just wanted to have some fun, was all. Break a dating losing streak! How did it ever come to this? The things she now knows about him are inconceivable. He’s her