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at their house for the first time he was very nervous and wanted desperately to make a good impression.
    Dinner seemed to be going fairly well, but about halfway through David glanced down and saw to his horror that his fly was unzipped. No one else had noticed, so very carefully and slowly, without looking down again, David managed to zip it up. What he didn't notice was that he had snagged the edge of tile tablecloth in the zipper. When dinner was over and he got up to walk away from the table, he pulled the tablecloth and sent all the dishes crashing to the floor.
    —————
    Mrs. Gardner came home from the grocery store and saw her husband working under the car. All that was visible were his legs and the lower part of his torso. She laughed and reached down and unzipped his fly. She was still laughing to herself as she walked into the house, but her laughter turned to shock when she saw her husband sitting in front of the television.
    "Who's out under the car?" she cried.
    "Oh, that's Harry from the garage. I couldn't figure out what was wrong with the car, so he said he'd come over and take a look."
    Then Mrs. Gardner told her husband what she had done, and they both went outside to see what Harry's reaction had been. They found him still under the car, unconscious, with a huge gash in his head.
    He had been so surprised by what had happened that he tried to sit up and banged his head.
    —————
    Grant and Madene Berger had been on a two-week camping trip. They had been having such a good time that they had delayed their return to the last possible moment, and Grant had to drive all night. By morning he was exhausted. They still had a long way to go and couldn't stop. Grant asked Madene to take over the driving while he went into the back of the camper to take a nap.
    Grant knew that it was illegal for anyone to ride in the back of a moving camper. He also knew that Marlene was not a very experienced driver with this vehicle. So he told her to drive slowly and not make any stops if she could help it.
    Grant got into the back of the camper for his nap. It was hot in the camper so he stripped down to his shorts. Still he was not able to sleep soundly. Every bump woke him up. He was worried that Mariene would be flagged down by the police. Then he felt the vehicle come to a dead stop. He got up, opened the door, and looked out to see what had happened.
    Marlone had merely stopped for a light, and when the light turned green she started up again, but since she did not shift gears smoothly the vehicle started with a lurch, which knocked Grant right out of the door onto the road.
    There he stood in his shorts, watching his camper disappear down the highway. A few moments later the police arrived.
    How am I going to explain this one? Grant thought.
    —————
    Willis owned a camper trailer, but he never drove it farther than the family campsite, about thirty miles from his home. The large spare gas tank that came with the trailer was useless to him. But Willis was a frugal fellow who hated to see anything go to waste, so he converted the spare gas tank to a holding tank for the camper toilet.
    He was asleep in the camper one night when he thought he heard some strange noises outside. In his semiconscious condition Willis decided that the noise was nothing more than a marauding raccoon, and so he went back to sleep.

    The next morning when Willis stepped out of his camper, he found that the noise had not been made by a raccoon. Someone had been trying to siphon gas out of his spare tank. There on the ground lay a siphon hose abandoned by the would-be thief, plus unmistakable evidence that after trying to suck the "gas" out of the spare tank, the thief had been very, very ill.
    —————
    Dr. Gray had seen a lot of strange injuries in his time, but nothing quite like the one suffered by the patient who now lay before him on a table in the emergency room.
    "How did it happen?" asked the doctor.
    The