Read You Disappear: A Novel for Free Online

shifts his weight uncertainly from one foot to the other before breaking in. “Frederik, there’s something else we need to talk about.”
    Frederik is so happy that his smile borders on laughter. Laust continues.
    “It may be that it’s a good idea to take a break from work until you have a clean bill of health again.”
    “What?”
    “It’s just that … if there’s the least chance of the illness affecting the choices you make, then it would probably be for the best.”
    “What!”
    I release my hold on Frederik’s belly and look around. His shout echoes in the concrete garage, but nobody else is down here.
    Laust has a muted, solicitous way of focusing on his friend. “I merelythink … if you end up making a couple of wrong decisions … It’s a foolish risk to run.”
    “I’m
not
going to make any wrong decisions!”
    “It’s just for safety’s sake. Until we’re one hundred percent certain you’re in top form again.”
    Frederik’s voice breaks. “But Laust, you’re not really going to shut me out from the school, are you?”
    Laust always looks so small standing next to Frederik, who towers above him by more than a head. “Frederik, you would be the one who would regret it most if you were to misjudge—”
    “But I
won’t
misjudge anything! I won’t!”
    Thorkild interposes in his husky voice. “Perhaps you should take a little time to consider—”
    “You want to shut me out of the school!” Frederik yells.
    His fist strikes Laust’s face, and then he shoves him down onto the asphalt.
    “Frederik! Frederik!” we shout.
    Without thinking, I throw myself upon the two of them and try to grab Frederik’s arms to pin them behind his back, while he rains blows down upon Laust. I get hold of one arm but he pulls free, I get the same arm again and he bites me on the hand.
    I’ve never done this kind of thing before, but two deep breaths and I can focus. With both hands I grab Frederik’s right arm and wrench it behind his back as quick as I can so he can’t bite or hit me. I shove him forward facedown against the concrete floor and sit on top of him, holding him in an armlock. He’s the one who’s sat behind a desk most of his life, while I’m six years his junior and a PE teacher to boot. He screams in pain.
    And keeps on yelling. About marital violence, about the school, about how we’re all shitheads.
    “Shut up!” I shout. “Shut up!”
    Laust manages to crawl out from under Frederik. I twist Frederik’s arm even harder, up toward his neck. Another scream. His brain, his poor sick brain: all that fat and blood in there, and furrows and fissures and something that’s growing—the fetuses I lost, so that we never had any more children.
    I glance up at Niklas, his long blond hair against the concrete ceiling of the parking garage. He’s bowed slightly forward, ready to fight, my pale boy, albeit with eyes confused. Whom should he fight?
    “Lie still, damn it,” I say.
    But Frederik continues to thrash whenever I’m not pressing on his arm and back. Vibeke squats down in front of his face.
    “Frederik,” she says, in a tone she might use to talk to a puppy that’s been mischievous. “Frederik, how
could
you?”
    Laust’s nose is bleeding and he has abrasions on one cheek. He sees my inquiring look.
    “I’ll be okay,” he says.
    The sound of his voice makes Frederik start to struggle again. “You want to shut me out of the school! From
my school
!
My school!
”
    I grip the hair on the back of his head and let my weight press his skull down against the concrete, but I let go as quickly as if I’d been shocked—I don’t want to press on the tumor.
    “Is this what it’s like?” asks Laust. “Is he really like this?”
    “We haven’t had any physical fights before,” I say, panting.
    The only one who keeps a cool head is my father-in-law. He gently lays a hand on Laust’s arm.
    “You know it’s not Frederik who’s doing this,” he says. “You know